Adoption Competence
”what is adoption competence?” and “how do I know if someone is adoption competent?” You would think we’d have a pretty good answer to this question by now seeing as the formalized institution of modern adoption in this country is over 100 years old. We can probably thank the “as if born to” and “blank slate” movements (coined by David Kirk as the “Denial of Difference” coping model) in mid-early adoption history for this. Since adoption was seen as being no different and presenting no more and no less challenges than being born into a biological family, it wasn’t always acknowledged that there is a necessity for specific knowledge in adoption-related issues. People new to the concepts may wince at the word “different.” Please don’t equate “different” with “bad.” There’s nothing wrong for being different from someone else. Also know, this isn’t just exclusive to adoptees. Original parents, especially mothers, had their own version of it as they were told to “go home and forget” their babies. Adoptive parents too were often told that adopting a child was the perfect resolution to not being able to bear children. And when you’re so busy not being different, no one asks you if you are OK during your experience of difference within society. No one can advocate for you if they don’t know what you go through. This is perhaps no better typified by my adoption in 1983. My original mother surrendered me and went home; no counselling. My adoptive parents adopted me, were told “she might have some questions but that’s about it” and went home; no counselling. This, from the largest adoption agency in the United States! So here we are, we’re acknowledging difference and the strengths and challenges difference entails in adoption more than ever. So, we have to answer the question, what does adoption competence look like?
Adoption competence, to me, is split into at least two different categories. One would be for helping professionals, like therapists and Social Workers. The other would be for every day people and the adoption community itself. Adoption competence and competence in the culture of adoption. Adoption competence would entail a helping professional who not only is competent in the culture of adoption but is also specifically trained in helping members within the adoption community deal with adoption-related issues. I am not a therapist. I am not a mental or behavior health professional. So I won’t talk about that one. What I want to share with you is a model to use to self-assess for cultural competence as well as assess where someone else may be at .
It’s Terry Cross’ Model of Cultural Competence. I think it is a really eye opening model and love how those who taught it to me apply it to how society or an individual can view a variety of diversity issues from class, to race, to sexual orientation, to gender, so on and so forth. What I think is especially interesting is the fact that you can (or I personally feel it can be) apply it to society or an individual’s understanding of the adoption community. What I love about using models like this is they add a little bit of objectivity. I could inflate my own self-importance and think that only I have all the answers and define “competence” in the culture of adoption as whatever it is I believe. But that’s not realistic and I hardly have all the answers.
There are six levels in Cross’ model.
The first level is called “Cultural Destructiveness.” This is where someone thinks that a particular group’s culture and differences are destructive and society would be better off if that group didn’t exist or would assimilate to be “more like” another group or the dominant culture.
The second level is called “Cultural Incapacity.” This is where someone lacks the skills to become more aware about culture. They do not question their pre-existing beliefs. They are paternalistic, feel superior, and demeaning towards others who are different than they are. They repeat stereotypes.
The third level is called “Cultural Blindness.” This is where we get the phrase “colorblind” from. While someone may not actively hate or dislike a member of the diverse group, an individual at this level denies that there are any problems or issues within society that the diverse group may be adversely impacted by. This is the “everything is fine” and “most people I know in this group are happy, what’s wrong with you?” and “you’re just an angry [insert name of diverse group membership here] person” or “I have a friend who is [insert diversity here] and he/she is fine.” They are proud of being ignorant to issues of diversity but their ignorance leaves them unable to acknowledge the fact that if you’re proud you can overlook or “ignore” something, you’ve labeled that something as negative or undesirable by default. If you don’t view diversity as bad or negative, why are you proud of being able to ignore diversity? This is the question this person fails to ask his or herself.
The fourth level is called “Pre-Competence.” This is where an individual starts to become aware of the issues surrounding culture and diverse communities and understands, on some basic level, that the issues are due to the way society, a dominant group, or the main group a sub-group belongs to, treats that group. This person may struggle becoming competent because they are not yet open enough to learning more and hearing what others have to say or they may not have information available to them.
The fifth level is called “Basic Cultural Competence.” This is where someone appreciates, accepts, and welcomes difference. Someone at this stage is aware of the challenges surrounding diverse groups and does what they can to listen, be supportive and help. This person acknowledges their own privileges. This person does what they can to communicate with members in groups of which they are not members and encourages open and honest communication between groups. This person seeks opinions and advice from as many members of as many groups as they can, realizing that with difference also comes strength and that strengthbenefits everyone.
The sixth level is called “Advanced Cultural Competence.” This last stage is where someone goes a step further and starts working to educate others about issues facing diverse groups. This person becomes an active advocate, speaks out about the issues, and works to give others a voice. This person dedicates considerable time to learning about issues of diversity and makes it a mission to share what they have learned with others.
Applying this to adoption at first may be tricky because adoption is an institution, not a person. People already walk around with this institution up on a petal stool that no one can so much as point out one issue about without people getting their shorts in a bunch, as if adoption the institution is some anthropopathic entity. Adoption is not anthropopathic. We should critique and reform the institution because it impacts real people who do have feelings. And it’s the people within adoption, the community and the various sub-communities, who society and the individual should work to be culturally competent in regard. Does the general public understand the various strengths and challenges that come with being a member of the adoption community or are we all just a bunch of freaks to them (level two)? Do they really take the time to understand our advocacy issues or do they take the stereotypes and actively work against progress and reform based on misinformation about the adoption community (level one)? Do they think we’re all pretty nice people but that “adoption is so different now” and “everything is wonderful” (level three)? Or do most people understand something more or go so far as to help or become an ally?
Does one sub-group or individual within adoption competently understand the culture of another sub-group within adoption?
Things I ask myself when it comes to self-assessing for cultural competence: (1) how do I feel and why? (2) am I part of the problem? (3) am I aware of all of the issues? (4) am I willing to stop, listen, and become aware? (5) am I being fair and kind and treating others the way I want to be treated? (6) what can I do today to spread awareness and promote communication, real, open, honest, communication between my group and another person’s group, groups in general, or between sub-groups?
If I can ask anything for an individual, society, my community (adoption) and my sub-group(s) within my community is for people to take one viewpoint they have, and ask yourself six very basic questions. Is any given belief I have a stereotype? Am I helping or hurting? Is everything really wonderful or is it wonderful to me because I haven’t been paying attention or have been ignoring what people are saying? Am I willing to learn more? What can I do to learn more and accept and accommodate a variety of adoptee thoughts and opinions?……
Am I willing to become an ally?
He’s more Earth, Wind and Fire; I’m more Mark Rothko (and Teena Marie)
Laughter and this man are inseparable companions.
comedy is one of the most powerful weapons in his arsenal…
behind the laughter, “his miami mind,” that organ of improbable erudition and flashy brilliance, though occasionally flawed, perception.
he’s an intellectual with the instincts of a street brawler, never happier than when engaged in moral or political fisticuffs.
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How to engage with an “ends justify the means” mentality?
“A tendency to sacrifice the process for the end result leads to a lack of energy, vitality and personal enjoyment… Because there is such a remarkable ability to attain goals, it’s important to distinguish between own goals and those imposed by society or environmental conditioning.” My struggle is how to recognize this distinction, identify my true goals and then go for it. Goals make me happy through the process itself, but what happens when the process is truncated by the mind?
Replacing this frustration with happiness is now the goal; recognizing that “a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush”— to learn to appreciate what life has already brought.
“Whiteness has been so ingrained socially, that racism often happens without any premeditated thought. The sad truth of the matter is that while White kids are being sheltered and taught to believe that they are special, kids of colour are actively being torn down and encouraged by the world to see themselves as “other”. White people may look at them as babies, and think that they are cute, but shortly after getting out of diapers, they begin to see Black boys as future rapists, thieves and gang bangers. They are systematically written off as a matter of course. The childhood that White children have, is denied to children of colour, in order to teach them their role in the pecking order. Discrimination does not wait until adulthood.”
